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7.7
The nature of desire, anticipation and ego
 
  Desire by ego is a strong emotion that effects our whole being. As we have discussed the word by its original component parts translates as "to have a strong wish for, to long for, crave, to feel the want of, to miss." As we also discussed, it is a peculiar word in that its Latin components parts de = "I", sider = "consider" and ate = "infatuation" (ate= the Latinized version of the Greek goddess of infatuation, considered the goddess of misfortune and rash destruction).  
  What we anticipate, what we desire is often greater in mental stimulation than the gratification we receive. More so, it is often the stimulation derived from anticipation of gratification that gives us greater pleasure than the final gratification. Let us explain further what we mean.  
7.7.1 The pleasure of anticipation for sex  
  Sexual anticipation is one of the greatest pleasures of the mind, surpassed only sometimes by the pleasure of sexual fantasy and masturbation.  
  What we mean is that the physical feelings experienced along with heightened stimulation from near anticipation of a sexual encounter where we find greater than level of overall sexual experience of the act.  
  To some, this might appear to be wrong and misguided, given our ability to recall moments of great sexual pleasure. However, are these memories exact? or are these memories accurate? For example, did the person we experience the sexual pleasure with look exactly like our memory of the experience? Did all of our memory of sexual pleasure come from the act, or did some of it come from the feeling of satisfaction in fulfillment of the expectation?  
  In this we explain fulfillment of expectation/desire as the goal of sexual pleasure with someone we have desired, someone we consider sexually attractive?  
  When we discount the memory of the pleasure derived from the fulfillment of desire/goal, is our memory of the actual sexual encounters still greater than our actual memory of the act?  
  Without the initial desire, without the anticipation, stimulation leading to the fulfillment would not necessarily be as pleasurable.  
  Thus, we see the mind, the ego, the desires of I playing a substantial part in the fulfillment of pleasure from the act.  
7.7.2 The loss of sexual pleasure at the lowering of anticipation  
  Conversely, we see examples in our own lives when the lowering of anticipation and heightened pleasurable stimulation actually leads to a lowering of the pleasure derived from sex.  
  Sometimes, this is misrepresented as familiarity. However, familiarity itself cannot be classed as a prime cause of the lack of anticipation. rather, it is how the ego changes its mind, once desired pleasures are fulfilled, or constantly fulfilled.  
  For many males, brought up with the modern developed world's models of pleasures, sexual experience of pleasure with a regular partner over a period, may lessen compared to the heightened potential pleasure from lusting for other female companions.  
  The pleasure, anticipation of alcohol/drugs  
  The thought of a favourite drink and its effects in anticipation actually changes our physical state. The same can be applied to almost any drug. The most pleasurable part is the combination of desire and the immediate point of gratification.  
  Often the effect of the drug is less than the anticipation. When discussing the addiction of injected drugs, the greatest pleasure is usually ascribed as "the hit", rather than the effect.  
  Once again, we see the mind being the greatest source of pleasure, compared to the physical effect of the drug.  
7.7.3 The pleasure/anticipation of food  
  That dogs start to salivate uncontrollably at the smell of attractive food and the near anticipation of fulfillment that we see signs of the effect of anticipation of mind.  
  Humans have also been shown to begin salivating in the near point of fulfillment of food. It is a key consideration in the behaviour of people to food. The sugar "hit", the pleasures of the first mouthful compared to the last. Once again we see mind playing an integral and superior role to that of the physical effect of the stimulus.  
7.7.4 The word "pleasure" itself denotes mind  
  If this is not enough support, then consider the word pleasure and the understanding of the influence of mind in the original definition outlined at the beginning of Me. The word denotes mind as a critical factor. Thus we see the word as self fulfilling- mind is critically important in determining what is pleasurable and what is not, because pleasure is a state of mind, not necessarily physical.  
7.7.5 The fine line between pleasure and pain  
  The fine line between pleasure and pain can be demonstrated in no better way than the way in which stimulation during sexual encounters can be reinterpreted in the mind as pleasurable and therefore trigger a pleasurable response, aiding chemical response.  
  Signals coming into the brain such as pain is reinterpreted as pleasure triggering the release of dopamine and other neurotransmitters. Pleasure and pain therefore are almost intertwined- both relate to response.  
  It is why some people not only are immune to pain but find pleasure in being hurt- the masochist. the person who has lost touch with what should by rights be the natural defence mechanism of their body to denote damage and pleasure being that stimulation that does not damage the body.  
  Sex to many people becomes muddy waters when these two important responses become intertwined. But it is ultimately the mind that does so and the ego- has a large part to play.  
 
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